Bane of My Existence
by Dream Howler

Author Notes: As you may notice below, I added book 7 to the Canon notes. Several of the characters that are important in this story have died. I am not going to suddenly kill them off unless I find just cause. This means that this story is definitely AU now if it wasn’t before. Sorry this took so long to publish. I have had writers block a good portion of the year.

Beta Notes: I want to thank my beta's who have helped me fix up this chapter, and make it much better than it was before. Much thanks to Keikokin, Nikki, ShadowMare, and Draeconin.

Canon Notes: I started planning and writing this story before the last two books were published. I am planning to incorporate some of both books, but I planned quite a few of the scenes before the books came out. Therefore, this story definitely isn’t following parts of known canon.


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Copyright: This plot/story is ©2004 - 2012 by Dream Howler. This story is the sole property of its author, and may not be copied, in whole or in part, or posted on any other website without the written permission of the author. As for the Characters that are in this story, they are the property of J.K. Rowling, and are only being borrowed for my enjoyment. I am not receiving money for writing this story, and have no money for any lawyers to take should they decide to sue me.

Chapter 6 Recap:

In chapter six, Draco decides that he wants to find out who Anton is at all costs. He follows Anton around, and tries to get him to reveal his secret. Right before Anton is about to crack, the band threatens to quit if Draco doesn’t leave him alone. Draco finally listens to them.

Professor Snape has given the band a great song that they really want to play. However, the song requires the man himself to sing the song. Draco and Anton ask Professor Snape to sing in their band. During these scenes, we find out a bit about Draco’s summer and several surprises about Professor Snape.


Chapter 7 - Exposed

During the last several band practices, Hermione became aware that she was being watched. Whoever it was, they were good at avoiding being caught, which narrowed it down to either Draco or Blaise. Considering Harry's relationship with Draco, she could only conclude that Blaise was looking at her. It could be argued that there was another person in the room, but she seriously doubted that Wayne could be sneaky enough not to be caught watching her. The only question was why Blaise was watching her. She certainly didn't match the description of any of his past interests. "Perhaps he needs some help in a class or something?" she thought.

When she first noticed that someone was watching her, she had wondered if someone had snuck into the room to watch the practice. The second time she felt it, she cast a revealing spell, and the only thing she noticed was that Harry's glamour was about to fail. She had to quickly catch his attention and give him a signal to go use the loo. Just as Harry reached the loo and slipped inside a cubicle, his glamour failed.

Harry was so happy with her warning that he had promised Hermione that whatever new book she wanted, she could just give him the title, and he would order it for her. He almost had his secret revealed right in front of the band, and was very grateful to his friend. That, of course, wouldn't be a good thing when the band was finally starting to get along again.


Draco had decided that the time had come to refrain from buying his way into forgiveness. He had thought of getting Anton some sort of gift, but the slightest mention of Draco using his money to try to make up for his slight stalking incident caused Anton to frown.

Finally, Draco had decided that the best thing he could do was write Anton a letter on parchment designed to make sure the writer told the truth. He had originally thought about writing a song, but found it hard to write a song to apologize for what was technically stalking his fellow band mate. Sitting down to write, he tried to convey his heartfelt apology.


Harry was sitting in the Great Hall when Draco’s owl winged its way in his direction. Quickly, Harry cast his eyes towards Draco and found that he was sitting with his back to Harry. Thanking Merlin, he quickly pulled the letter out of the owl’s grip, and hid it in his bag to read later.

That night, Harry pulled the curtains on his bed, and opened the letter.

Dear Anton,

It is hard for me to express how sorry I am for invading your privacy. I have no excuse for doing so, and I hope that in time you will forgive me. I have never been in this sort of position before; I was taught from a very early age that apologizing made one weak and brought one’s family shame.

Sadly, up until this year I spent about ninety-nine percent of my childhood totally controlled. Though my father loved me, he always expected perfection. He would often schedule times where he would tutor me in every topic that he thought would be acceptable. It didn’t really matter what I thought about the topic either.

The first time I really stood up to my father was when I told him I was gay. He had just finished telling me about the perfect pureblood witch that he had found for me to marry. I told him that I refused to marry some witch to produce an heir, only to cheat on her for the rest of our lives. Father even wanted to pick out both; he didn’t care if I actually loved the guy or not, he just wanted to make sure that the person would be discreet enough to be the “Malfoy Mistress.”

What was even worse is that he wanted the witch to agree that she wouldn’t have any relationships on the side, yet I was allowed to have them. I told him that it wasn’t fair that she had to give up the rest of her life married to a man that would only be with her once in the marriage, maybe twice if she wanted more than one child and never get to have sex again.

Needless to say, I told him, no. Anyway, I seem to have gotten off topic. What I was trying to say is that I am so very sorry for everything I did. I shouldn’t have tried to invade your privacy. I wasn’t being a very good friend, and I am ashamed of myself. I should have respected your wishes.

I guess my only excuse is that with my father’s excessive control of my life, I decided not to let myself fall into that trap again. I guess that not knowing everything about you felt like I was relinquishing the control I have been building for myself.

Please forgive me.

Draco.

After Harry finished reading the letter, he realized that the paper was charmed to tell the truth. A smile lit up his face at the apology, yet the smile quickly became a frown when he remembered what lengths that Lucius Malfoy would go to in order to preserve his family’s pureblood line.


Severus had been working on his new identity for over a week when he finally decided what he would look like. Once his disguise was complete, Severus had most of his normal looks without the Glamour; however, there were a few differences. First, Severus had changed his hair to a dark brown; he felt that it wasn't a good idea to change everything too much. Subtlety was always the best way to hide, not like Harry's total change.

Severus changed his eye colour to a copper brown, which was close enough to his normal deep black eyes. He lengthened his hair to match his Head of House status. It didn't really matter that he wasn't a pureblood, he was still the Head of his family. He then tied the hair back in a neat ponytail with a leather strap. He had to admit, he looked much better with long hair than his normal hairstyle.

Searching his closet, he pulled out a pair of black jeans that fit his figure like a glove. He was quite sure that no one would think that this professor would own such a thing. However, from living in the Muggle world for much of his childhood until his mother wised up and left his abusive father, he often carried clothing to blend in. He had acquired several new items of more formal Muggle clothes thanks to Draco's trip to London, but he felt that it wouldn't be a good idea to dress up when the band usually wore leather or jeans themselves. He took out a deep green silk shirt and slipped it on. Turning, he looked in the mirror and smiled a rare smile at himself. It was nice to look less like the greasy git persona that everyone, including the Dark Lord saw every day.

Even with the help of his potion, his nose was still large, and might be recognizable. Therefore, he decided to make it smaller to make sure that no one would recognize him. Turning his head, he looked in the mirror again checking out his profile. "That will work nicely," he thought to himself.

It took quite a bit of concentration to fool the Dark Lord into thinking that he was just an ugly greasy man with no hopes of attracting anyone. Normally, the Dark Lord, and even Dumbledore himself, could see through Glamours, but Severus was gifted with creating spells. He had created his own Glamour spell that was so concrete, that neither the Dark Lord nor Dumbledore had ever mentioned seeing through it; it even bypassed the normal cancellation spells. It was a work of genius, if he said so himself.

Just as he had finished his transformation, there was a knock on the door to his classroom. Casting a charm to reveal who was on the other side of the door, he relaxed when he saw it was just Anton and Draco. Cancelling the spell on the door, he unlocked the door and let the pair in the room.


Anton and Draco had received a summons from Professor Snape shortly after their last class of the day. They had actually arrived on time to meet their professor, and they both were anxious with anticipation. Would the professor even accept their proposition? They noticed he had been intrigued. Had he decided that he could pull off something like this?

Anton and Draco were still slightly apprehensive about the whole situation. Blaise and Wayne were understandably upset when they found out that they were bringing someone new into the band without asking them first. They were further concerned that they would have to be sworn to silence about his identity.

Anton and Draco had smirked at each other, and presented the pair with the song and then told the two the identity of the writer was none other than Professor Snape. The duo laughed, and agreed that it would be a grand joke to make one of the rumours the school had circulated about Anton come true.

As Anton and Draco entered the classroom, Anton stood at the door trying not to let his mouth gape open. "That can’t be Professor Snape can it?" Anton thought. "Merlin! Is that his normal looks or his Glamour? Wait, it can’t be his real looks; his hair and eyes are brown. However, if his real looks are anywhere close to this one, I can understand why he wears a Glamour now. He could make that fool Lockhart look ugly in comparison!’

Severus didn’t get any taller, however he looked more than a hundred percent better. His normally large nose was smaller and corrected quite nicely. His hair, which normally appeared quite greasy, fell in gentle waves down Severus’ back, tied with a strip of leather, and looked quite soft and manageable. Severus now sported clean, creamy skin that could rival Draco’s. In fact, Severus’ skin had improved so much, Anton was wondering how the Glamour was covering it. Anton himself had only changed his head in his Glamour; he couldn’t imagine the power it took maintain a full body Glamour all the time.

After several minutes of pondering why Severus had decided to put on his Glamour all the time, Anton had an epiphany. "Wait a minute! I understand now. He saw how the students acted around Lockhart, and he probably figured that if he tried to teach a class like that, there would be so many explosions that Neville’s past mistakes wouldn’t even cover one day. Of course, having students fawn all over him probably would make Severus queasy as well."

Severus stood silently observing the pair as they entered his classroom. Draco didn’t seem to be too surprised. Anton, on the other hand, was a different story. Normally, he couldn’t tell what kind of emotions Anton was experiencing these days, but today there was no way he could miss it. It caused him to chuckle to himself. Harry Potter found him attractive. He just knew that James Potter was rolling over in his grave right now.

Severus smirked at Anton and cleared his throat to stop Anton’s perusal of his body. “Well, I can tell from the look on Mr. Stryder’s face that my new looks are an effective disguise. Do you think that anyone would associate my current looks with the greasy bat of the dungeons?”

Anton flushed slightly and looked at the ground as he muttered, “If they did, they probably would need their eyes checked.”

Severus chuckled softly, causing Anton to glance up at him quickly in shock. In all the years that Anton had known the man, he had never heard him laugh. It was quite an interesting sound, really; a bit throaty, even what could be called a purr, or so it seemed to Anton. As Anton turned towards Draco, he realized that hadn’t heard a real laugh out of Draco before either. Was it just a Slytherin thing to not laugh too often? Shrugging mentally, Anton looked up again at his professor. “I take it from your appearance that you have decided to take us up on our offer?”

Severus nodded. “As you said, I don’t want to have to teach for the rest of my life. Each year, I run out of patience for the students in my classes at an alarming rate. Once the Dark Lord is dead, I hope that I can pursue something else in my life. This would give me an opportunity to do something different. I can always make potions for a research company, but it would be nice to do something that won’t require me to report to a boss. I have been writing songs since I was a small boy; it is a waste that I don’t share them with the world.”

Anton nodded, understanding completely. Harry still had yet to ask Professor Snape to train him to defeat Voldemort. He was positive that the sorry excuses for Defence teachers throughout his seven years at Hogwarts hadn’t prepared him for anything. Without training, there was no way he would stand a chance against a wizard more than five times his age, with even more times the experience.

Harry had also not found any powers that matched the prophecy that Professor Dumbledore told him about. He certainly didn’t know if Professor Dumbledore was right about love being a power Voldemort knew not. It just didn’t make sense. How could you kill someone with love? Sure, Dumbledore knew Tom in school, but surely there had to have been someone that Tom loved in his life.

Of course, considering the Horcruxes, perhaps it wasn’t possible that love could even happen with several parts of your soul stored all over the place. On the other hand, he supposed it was possible that Tom loved someone before he tore apart his soul. Maybe losing his love was what tipped the scales, though wouldn’t Dumbledore have mentioned it? "Perhaps not," Anton thought.

Coming out of his reverie, he realized that Draco and Professor Snape were having a conversation without him.

“I just don’t think that name suits you, sir. Perhaps you should just pick one name like the ones some of the Muggle singers do? What do you think, Anton?”

Anton blinked in confusion. “I didn’t hear the choices, sorry; I was a little deep in thought.”

Draco harrumphed. “Well, I hope it was inspiration for a new song, and not some random thoughts about Professor Snape.”

Anton looked at Draco, startled. “What? What is that supposed to mean? Are you saying that the only thing I could possibly have on my mind is either the Professor’s looks or the band? Because I have to tell you, other things out there are important too. Oh, and by the way, why do I hear jealousy in your voice?”

Draco flushed, which caused Anton to smile inwardly. Draco was quite cute when he was blushing. It was something that Anton found infinitely attractive, especially since it didn’t happen very often.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. I… never mind. I know there are other things to think about,” Draco stuttered, embarrassed.

Anton continued blinking at Draco with a confused look. Draco had sounded jealous of Anton’s comments and glances at Professor Snape. Did he somehow suspect that Anton was Harry? If he suspected, how long would it take before Draco confronted him and kicked him out of his life. Anton doubted that, by now, Draco could afford to kick him out of the band, though, the charade had gone on long enough. The time had come to tell Draco the truth. Anton just hoped that he would survive the experience intact.

“We should probably allow the Professor to pick his own name. It is his life after all,” Harry commented.

Severus nodded. “Well, I had first thought of Raven, which sounded suitable at the time. However, I have learned recently of a Seer in the Americas that has that name, and I believe she also sings in the Muggle world. It wouldn’t do to take someone’s name like that. So recommendations are appreciated.”

“Well, we will come up with something soon. No reason to decide this minute. We don’t want to make a snap decision now and have you regretting it later,” Anton replied.

Severus nodded. “Very true. It is never advisable to make snap decisions if one can help it. Well, I think that concludes this meeting for the moment. When is your next practice? I will see if I can make it.”

“It’s Sunday afternoon at four, unless something happens,” Draco answered.

Severus nodded. “I think I might be able to make that, problems aside. Have a good evening gentlemen.”

Draco and Anton nodded, and started walking towards the door to leave. Both of them were wondering how their own Saturday would go.


Through the combined efforts of Dumbledore, Harry, and Snape, five of the seven Horcruxes had been destroyed. Hufflepuff’s cup had been hidden in Gringotts in Bellatrix Lestrange’s vault. When Voldemort was planning the final battle, he decided that it would be a good idea to check up on his Horcruxes. It was most logical to check on the most secure object, Hufflepuff’s cup, first.

** FLASH BACK **

Severus had just reached the entrance to the main sitting room in Malfoy Manor where Voldemort normally held court for his minions . Inside, he heard Voldemort hissing to his favoured servant Bellatrix Lestrange.

“Bella, I want you to go to your vault and bring me the object that I left in your keeping many years ago,” hissed Voldemort.

“Yes, my Lord. I will bring it back as soon as possible,” Bellatrix simpered.

As Bellatrix headed towards the door, Severus hurried back down the hallway, and turned around quickly. Once Bella exited the chamber, Snape made it look like he had just arrived. She gave him an odd look, but hurried past him as Severus went in to give his report.

After giving his report, he hurried to Gringotts just in time to see Bellatrix exit the bank. Looking around, he noticed that no one was really looking at him, so he quickly cast a Confundus Charm, and watched her turn into a dark alleyway. Once he had her there, he quickly knocked her out with a spell and grabbed the cup. Once he had it in his possession and realized that it was a Horcrux, he made a duplicate of the cup, and put in her hands.

To make sure he wasn’t seen, he Disillusioned himself, and revived her. Once she stood and gathered her wits about her, he Obliviated her, and planted a new memory of her exiting the bank with the cup.

After she left the alleyway, fake cup in hand, Severus made his way to Hogwarts to hand over the genuine cup to Dumbledore. An hour later, Severus was summoned to a Death Eater meeting where Bellatrix was Crucio'd for her failures. By the time Voldemort was finished, she had several serious injuries, including several broken ribs that he ordered to heal without magic for losing the real cup.


Harry found Ravenclaw’s diadem coincidently enough, at Hogwarts. From its location in the pile of junk in the Room of Requirement, it had been in residence at Hogwarts since Dumbledore had denied Tom a job at Hogwarts. Harry had received a message from Dumbledore that there was a Horcrux at Hogwarts. Later, Harry deduced that he had to ask the Room of Requirement for the room where everything that was lost could be found. Needless to say, the room needed some serious housecleaning.

After searching for quite some time, Harry and Ron found the diadem, and used the Room of Requirement to help him destroy it. Hermione had deduced that Fiendfyre would be a last resort to get rid of the object, but they had to be especially careful and only use it sparingly. However, the spell got a little out of control, and it consumed most of the storage area. Luckily, Harry and Ron escaped with their lives.

The most intriguing part of the whole situation was that after the diadem was destroyed, Dumbledore told Harry that the curse on the Defence position appeared to have been broken.


Harry wasn’t sure what would happen with the other two Horcruxes. He figured that he would have to probably find them without his mentor’s help. He knew that one of them had to be Voldemort’s snake, Nagini, but he would probably have to get Professor Snape’s help to tackle that task. Dumbledore told him just last week that the school would have to hire several new teachers. Professor Dumbledore was stepping down as soon as they found a replacement Transfiguration Professor.

Since the incident with Gaunt’s ring, Dumbledore’s health had steadily gone downhill. Professor Snape was trying his hardest to keep him alive with potions, but the headmaster’s magic was draining slowly. Soon, he would be a Squib and later die, most likely before the end of the year. When the Board of Governors heard about his health, they had reluctantly recommended that he retire due to health reasons. He had agreed, against his better judgment. It was a sad day for Hogwarts.


Saturday morning arrived bright and early, Harry severely lacking in sleep. Harry tried several times to go back to sleep after his roommates had woken him up for the third time, even when he threw pillows at them to keep quiet. Finally, after all of them went down to breakfast, Harry was able to take a nap. He thought after seven years sleeping in a dorm with four other boys that he would get used to all the snoring and noises his roommates made. However, that wasn’t the case, as the roommates seemed to get worse with every passing year. It almost made him miss the quietness of his cupboard under the stairs: almost, but not quite.

When Harry awoke several hours later it was time to get up, take a shower, and get dressed for his date. Nervously, Harry had dressed in a nice pair of slacks, and a blue silk shirt that Hermione said made his eyes sparkle with flecks of blue. Harry still felt a bit uncomfortable with silk after years of wearing hand-me downs for most of his life. He was happy that he finally had some clothes that fit.

Hermione, once she had found out all his sizes, randomly purchased clothes on holidays for him. He now had an extensive wardrobe, though he didn’t always wear them because it was a bit impractical to dress in most of the clothes every day.

He looked in the bottom of his wardrobe, found some nice ankle boots, and pulled them on. He walked to the bathroom and applied the hair spell that he found in the book that he normally used as Anton to tame his wild hair. He lengthened it slightly, and gave it a more tousled look that looked like he had just had a great shag, and not its normal rat’s nest. Overall, Harry thought he looked quite nice. Hopefully, Draco would appreciate the effort.


Draco was in the Room of Requirement setting up the romantic dinner that he had planned. He had called one of his house-elves from the Manor to Hogwarts to fix the dinner. He had selected a creamy chicken alfredo, a small dinner salad, and a strawberry cheesecake for desert.

Harry had mentioned several times that chicken alfredo and cheesecake were two of his favourite dishes. Draco hadn’t had the dish in quite awhile, but he decided that he would get his elf to make it because he wanted Harry to be happy.

Mipsey had also brought along a pitcher of pumpkin juice and several Butterbeers for them to drink.


Harry arrived on time to the Room of Requirement, which surprised Draco, though he didn’t say anything to Harry. Draco grinned down at Harry; being able to treat Harry like he was royalty. It felt good somehow, knowing that Harry grew up mistreated and alone.

Harry was extremely happy once he realized the lengths Draco went to make sure he had a good time. The only downside was that all this might be for nothing when he told Draco the truth about his alternate personality.

Determined to have a good time despite the bomb that he would drop later, he began talking to Draco about things they hadn’t discussed in their letters. It was interesting to find out that Draco liked cats. His mother had several, and he had always grown up with them. Harry thought it was interesting, mainly because quite a bit of Draco’s movements were graceful like a cat’s.

After dinner, Draco asked Harry if he wanted to walk around the lake for a while, so the pair exited the castle, talking about nonsense things along the way. Harry had decided during dinner that afterwards, he would tell Draco. When Draco had asked Harry to walk around the lake, he decided to ask Draco back to the Room of Requirement and tell him then.


Harry and Draco were walking around the lake, quietly soaking up the atmosphere when Harry began humming softly. It took Draco several minutes to realize that Harry was humming the song that he and Anton had been writing yesterday. Suddenly, Draco stopped walking, and let go of Harry’s hand.

Startled, Harry looked at Draco. “Draco, are you okay?” he asked, looking concerned.

“Sure, Harry, I am entirely fine. Though, could you explain to me why you were humming the song that Anton and I were writing yesterday?”

Harry blinked, and suddenly realized what he did. “I can explain, Draco, really.”

Draco crossed his arms, tapping his foot on the ground. “I am waiting, Harry, were you spying on us? You know, you could have asked to come to practice. You didn’t have to follow us, Harry.”

“I didn’t follow you, Draco,” Harry replied.

“Then what? The only way you could have heard that song was if you were in the room with us. The door is soundproofed, so I doubt you could have been walking by and heard it,” Draco responded.

“I think we should go back to the Room of Requirement to finish this conversation. People have ears, and someone might overhear our conversation. I don’t think you really want to discuss this here.”

Draco glared slightly at Harry. “All right, but I want an explanation when we get there.”

Harry nodded. “I promise you will get an explanation when we get there.”

Harry and Draco walked back to the Room of Requirement in silence. Draco was trying to figure out how Harry had heard the song. Harry had said that he hadn’t been spying on the band, which left only a few very small possibilities. It occurred to Draco that there were many eerie coincidences that surrounded the band’s lead singer. "Was it possible that Anton had recorded the song, and Harry had just overheard it?" Draco thought.

Draco was jolted out of his thoughts when the pair approached the Room of Requirement. They walked inside, and Harry cast a Silencing Spell on the door before turning towards Draco.

Draco stood silently as Harry warded the door, his arms crossed, and unapproachable. “Well, explain then. I have an idea, I just want the truth.”

Harry nodded. “I doubt you will like the truth, but I did promise you. I just hope you won’t be too upset with me.”

Draco blinked and looked at Harry confused. “Well, get on with it, Harry. I am quickly running out of patience.”

Harry nodded and sighed. “I am not spying on the band, Draco, because I am in the band. You can’t exactly spy on something that you are in.”

“You’re Anton? That’s not possible! I have seen you two together. You can’t be in two places at the same time.” Draco sputtered.

Harry shrugged. “Ever heard of Polyjuice, Draco? It was Ron, pretending to be me so no one would question why I wasn’t there. I tried to get one of the professors to give me a detention, but none of them were willing.”

“This is some sort of trick, you just can’t be Anton. You just overheard Anton playing the song or something. You and Anton are nothing alike!” Draco replied excitedly.

“It’s no trick, Draco. Tell me honestly, when you read Pawn, who did you think it was about?”

“You and maybe me?” he whispered softly. “Why in the world would you do this to me? Why didn’t you tell me that it was you? I would have understood, or at the very least given you the benefit of the doubt.”

Harry dropped down on the couch and rested his face in his hands. “Draco, I didn’t do anything to you or for you. I did it for me. Well, no, I take that back. You were the reason I disguised myself. I joined the band before I knew you were writing me those letters, you know that. I almost thought about quitting after I found out. I couldn’t stand to see you so sad because of me. I was scared, all right? The great Harry Potter was scared because I… I…. was falling for Caesius and it turned out to be you, Draco. Go ahead and laugh, kick me out of the band if you like, but it’s hard finding out you’re having feelings for someone that hated you for so long.”

Draco sighed, as he sat down on the couch next to Harry. “Harry, I never really hated you, I was just mad that you rejected me. Do you really think I would have written to you for most of this year if I did? I even told you that in that letter after you ran off from me.”

Harry nodded. "Remember, Draco, I didn't get that letter until much later."

“I know, Harry,” replied Draco.

Harry sighed again. “I’m sorry, Draco. I am glad that you eventually sent it to me but, though I knew you liked me, I was afraid. I have been disguising myself this whole time, and technically when we started to date, I thought if you knew it was me that you would kick me out of the band and break up with me.”

Draco shook his head. “Even if you had come as yourself, you would have stood a great chance, Harry. You’re talented, you write great songs, I…”

Harry shook his head. “I didn’t know that, Draco. I knew you were being nice to me, but how was I to know you would have accepted me into your band? If I told everyone I was in the band, sure, it would probably make it a bit famous… but I wouldn’t get to be me. This is something I love doing, something I am good at… something that doesn’t link me to the war. I can’t tell anyone else, Draco… you have no idea how happy just being someone else makes me.”

Draco smiled slightly. “Of course I know how you feel, Harry. Remember, we discussed your fame, and all this kind of thing in your letters. Do you really think I would tell anyone?”

Harry blushed and looked down at the floor quietly. “I didn’t quit the band because I wanted to get to know you, the new you, without you knowing. I guess you could say ‘turnabout is fair play’, but I did eventually plan on telling you, though I hoped it could wait for a bit. I was actually going to tell you tonight, even though I figured that you might kick me out, and all my happiness would be ruined.”

“You know, I should have known it was you, really. I had suspected that you were either the same person or good friends. Guess I now know why,” said Draco. “If you will excuse me, I think I need to get back to my dorm. I need to think about this. Goodnight, Harry,” Draco said hurriedly. He turned and walked away before Harry even got a chance to respond.

Harry stood staring after Draco for a good five minutes before he realized that Draco had left him alone because he had screwed up. The song that he and Draco had written was stuck in his head for several days, waiting to be finished, and it seemed that he had actually started to hum the song aloud, which Draco heard. Could this day get any worse?


As Draco walked back to his dorm, his mind was swirling with thoughts about Harry. In some ways, he had the right to be mad, but in others, Harry had only followed Draco’s previous example. However, it could be argued that Harry hadn’t known it was Draco’s footsteps that he was following. The point was simply, how could he justify being mad that Harry had lied to him, when he had done the same thing to Harry? At this point, it might be better to sleep on the question instead of making hasty decisions like a typical Gryffindor.

The problem was that he understood that Harry probably had more than a few good reasons for hiding his appearance. The thing that cut deep was he didn’t know which Harry was real. Was he the playful, soulful Anton, or the Golden Boy that most saw? Harry had insisted that he was both, but had more of Anton’s personality than Harry’s. He had to admit that Anton’s personality was preferable to Harry’s in some ways, though.

Anton’s main personality was actually rather laid back. He didn’t seem to stress about things, and was quite observant of his surroundings. It made Draco wonder if he had been like this all along and was hiding it, or if something had happened to change him. The only thing he did know is that he had been attracted to Anton since he first saw him, so if Harry’s personality were more like Anton’s, then Draco would be a very happy man.

Once the war was over, Harry really wouldn’t have to be himself anymore. He could just become Anton, and not have to worry about his fame or anything else if he didn’t want to. Draco just had to make sure that Harry survived to live out the dream. This would require him to ask his mentor for help, which at this time, he was certain he would receive; he just had to figure out how to ask.


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